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Author's Note: This story is basically what the Two Minutes of Hate would be like if it consisted of demons spewing hate at Jesus. Not only did I write this story as a worldbuilding exercise, but I also used it as an excuse to flex my knowledge of metal. See if you can guess all the references. This contains lots of blasphemous content, so be warned.
A colossal crowd of demons of every shape, size, and color amassed outside the towering black metal walls of Pandemonium, the capitol city of Hell. Like magma creeping across the ground, they made their way to a hill called the Mound ov Mockery. This was the time of year when they would howl mockery at the cross.
The custom began sometime after the Harrowing of Hell. Just when Satan thought he had achieved complete victory over mankind, Christ brought salvation to all the souls who were trapped in Hell since the beginning of the universe. The demons were deeply traumatized by this event. They wanted to get back at Him somehow, so they came up with an elaborate event that was held every year on the Day of Crucifixion.
The crowd that gathered at the base of the hill stretched all the way to the horizon. Those of highest rank, the Goetic Demons, were front and center. Behind them were the Barons, Hellknights, and lower ranking fallen angels. All the lesser demons were in the back. The smaller individuals had to climb on top of the larger ones to get a better view. Those with wings were able to hover in place. All who could attend the event did so. Notably absent were Zagan, Vinea, and Belial. Zagan was stuck at the Hellforge, Vinea was stuck at the Tree of Zaqqum, and Belial was always busy doing Satan’s personal bidding.
Off in the distance a Hellpanzer approached, dragging a large black wood cross behind it. The crowd cleared a path and the tank brought the cross to the top of the hill. Already many of the attendees had begun to boo and hiss. The Goetic Demons carried forth a straw effigy, put it upon the cross, and hammered it into place. Shouts of scorn had broken out among the crowd. One of them screamed, “Hammer down the nails!”
The cross was raised upright and appeared as a grim silhouette against the burning red sky. Many were gritting their teeth and foaming at the mouth. Baal, one of the nine Kings of Hell, approached the front of the cross on his four spider-like legs. He pointed a wrinkled, bony finger at the straw effigy and proclaimed in a croaking voice, “We curse you, oh wretched Nazarene. We will dethrone you and destroy your kingdom. We will slaughter your lambs and obliterate your monuments. All life will be extinguished and your impotent father’s creation will be the dominion of Hell.”
The crowd erupted into a frenzy of jeers and insults. “Bastard son!” “Dead jew on a stick!” “Savior to none, failure for all!” The Hellknights clattered their weapons together, creating an ear-ringing cacophony. The goatmen let out livid bleats. The smaller demons jumped up and down while shouting expletives at the effigy. The larger ones stamped their feet and slammed their fists on the ground. The flying ones took boiling blood from the moat around the city walls and splashed it upon the cross. Soon, all the countless demons in the crowd were spewing forth hate and mockery.
Asmodeus approached, looked up at the cross, and said, “Humiliated savior, son of Heaven’s failure, I will violate your whore mother and eviscerate your father. I will rape all life and defile your precious creation.”
All the demons were in a fit of rage now. Beleth walked up to the cross, her hands aflame, her teeth clenched, her red irises glowing bright, her cat ears twitching, her tail wagging furiously, and screamed, “In the name of Satan, our hate will consume Heaven! We will annihilate the holy land and lay to waste your precious dreams!”
Fire shot forth from her hands and the cross was instantly engulfed in flames. The hate had reached a fevered pitch. Many started chanting, “Burn! Burn! Burn!” Like the beating of a war drum, they bellowed that word over and over again until the cross finally fell apart and turned to ash. The crowd cheered, and once the smoke had died, all the demons dissipated. Many went back to Pandemonium, some went to the Hellforge, and the rest went to the mountains, valleys, and other nefarious regions.
Two days later, misery swept across the denizens of Hell like an ocean wave as the prayers of countless mortals caused them unbearable pain. This happened every year. They would howl mockery at the cross, confident in their belief they would soon achieve total victory over God’s creation, but despite their best efforts, the faithful held firm. No matter what they tried, God always found a way to thwart their schemes. Their misery would then give way to fear, for they knew that He could easily annihilate them for their blasphemy. Then their fear would turn to anger as their resentment towards Him would come back to the surface. How long this cycle would go on they had no idea.
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